![]() We tend indeed to avoid being too open about how we feel. To expand your views on the contribution try to look at yourself from the other party’s shoes and then look at the whole situation from a third party perspective.Įxpressing emotions openly is difficult for many of us. Role assumptions: We often assign ourselves positives roles in the issue which is comfortable for us but not useful.Intersections: We are all different form opinions based on part experiences and references, but there are no right or wrong, just intersections.Moving quickly, avoiding contact, being generally unfriendly Being unapproachable: Behaving in any way that makes it hard to talk to.Avoiding until now: We often contribute to a problem by avoiding for so long, allowing it grow.Here are four common contributions people oft Telling first our own contributions can help the other party move away from the natural tendency of blaming. The authors say we should instead focus on finding out how we all contribute to the situation. ![]() ![]() The simple solution is to ask the other party what was their intent.Īnd the third mistake is to assign blame, which can quickly escalate the situation and take us further from any resolution. So if we are hurt, then we tend to believe the other party intention was to hurt us, and that’s often just not the case.Īlso, there’s a certain tendency of going with the worst possible option, which certainly doesn’t help in conflict resolution. But they are often wrong because we base those assumptions on our own feelings. The second common mistake is that people often assume to know what the other party’s intentions are. What we should do instead is to understand what interpretations of those events are and what is important to each party.įor a good resolution, the parties involved should move from their own views of the fact to a curiosity about the other person’s view of the events. The authors say that the common mistake is to stop at what has happened at a superficial level. Identity: some conversation can go to our personal core.Feelings: the feelings and emotions involved, that most people try to cut out.What happened: usually involving the facts, what should happen and where the blame lies.The authors say that underlying difficult conversations are three deeper conversation, which are: ? SUPPORT BESTBOOKBITS BY CLICKING THE LINKS BELOWĭifficult conversations are all those conversations we’d rather avoid such as complaining to a neighbor about their barking dog or asking for a salary increase at work. ? MY FREE BOOK TO LIVING YOUR DREAM LIFE”
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